I miss my abuelo

My sister, Jessica sent me an IM with a website for photography www.royllera.com and said that the photographer had a whole section on Cuba. I thought I'd check it out. It had me in tears! Not so much the pictures themselves, or the conditions they live in, but the fact that this is a culture that makes up 50% of my blood and I know nothing about it! I knew they were living in bad conditions, but I had no idea that Havana was so poor. It looks like a step up from a third world country. I didn't know! My father came to America with his family when he was 8 years old. Eventually, he moved up to the midwest while his family stayed in Florida. He met and married my mom and they had 4 kids. They were divorced a long time ago, but we all are very close to my dad. But because we didn't live with him, we don't speak Spanish and we don't know much about our heritage or our culture. I've met my grandparents twice, Florida is so far and we don't have the money to see them more often. I married Todd and we had Ava a year ago. I wanted to visit them so they could meet their great-granddaughter, but I kept putting it off. Not enough time, money, etc. Excuses. My grandmother died a few months ago of complications from diabetes. I really regret not going to see them sooner. I went through the pictures of Cuba and wept. I want to know more. I should know more about my heritage and the pictures have me aching to know more. Particularly the photo of the old woman sitting at the table playing dominos. She reminds me so much of my abuela. The last time I went down to visit them, the whole family spent hours sitting at a little table playing dominos. So I talked to Todd and I am calling my father today and I would like to plan a visit to my abuelo and the rest of my family within the next month. I can't keep making excuses. I need to know about my heritage & I want Ava to know too.